Glory Glory Glory

God doesn't need me.

A major theme in life since becoming a Believer is God's glory. From what it means to how it is displayed to it being the point of my life, I have constantly learned things about God's glory.  Frequent questions I ask myself are: 1)How can I glorify God? and 2) What can I do to bring Him more glory? And this weekend, sitting in Inistioge in one of the most beautiful places I can imagine, I realized how wrong those questions are.

God doesn't need me to glorify Him. In fact, I cannot give Him any more glory than He already has! While yes, I want my life to please and be an expression of His glory, it doesn't give Him more glory. He has the glory. When Jesus lived the perfect life, died on the cross, overcame death, and broke sin, that is God's expression of glory. He already has all the glory simply because of Who He is. Yes, God in and of Himself is glorified because of Who He is.

And so I cannot do anything to bring God more glory. God doesn't need me to do that. He can't have more glory because He already has it all!

I constantly find myself trying to live up to what God has done for me. After all, He sacrificed it all. And He did it for me. So shouldn't I live a life that is worthy of that? The funny thing (well, not so funny, really) is that I can't. I can never be worthy. When I was preparing to be baptized, Daddy asked me, "What would you say to God if, when you got to the gates of Heaven, He asked, 'Why should I let you in here? What have you done to earn this?'" I thought about it, and as we talked, the answer became clear: "In all honesty, Lord, You shouldn't let me in here. I have done nothing. But You did it for me, and because of Jesus' sacrifice, You forgave me." That is true. Yet I still find myself pushing myself harder, pressuring myself to "earn" God's love, to be worthy of the sacrifice that He made for me. Even though I know the truth, that there is no way I can ever live up to it, that is where I find myself time and time again.

Now a new part of that struggle has been realized. I can't bring God glory, because He has already done it. All I can do, all that I can do, is love Him. And that does not mean living a perfect life, because God knows that I can't and He does not expect that of me. What it does mean is chasing after God first and foremost. It means not settling for what I feel but trusting what I know to be true. It means wrestling and not giving up and not taking the easy way. Loving God means I fail but in my failings I don't despair; instead I rejoice at the God I serve! It means I choose life in every thought and action.

No, I am not enough. I am not worthy. But God looks at me, He sees me for who I am, He sees the dirt and filth and shame, and He smiles and says, "You are Mine. I love you. And see, I am doing a new thing! I am making you new, and I delight in that! You are not enough, but I AM."

And so today, again, I choose to trust and walk in Him and live in the freedom of loving the Lord.