Thoughts

I've been reading 1 Timothy, and I have been really struck by some things.

My first day here, I read chapter 1 where it says, "Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners - of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display His immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life." I was really struck by the idea of what it means to live with the knowledge that I am the worst of sinners. Because even though I believe all sin is equal (although if there is worse sin it is those committed after becoming a Believer - which is where the majority of my sins are committed, which makes me the worst of sinners), I also believe that I have to live with the concept that I am the worst of all men. I see that in myself, I feel that in myself, my failure, my guilt. Yet look at what Christ Jesus has done in me! He truly has displayed His mercy and patience for me. If I accept this knowledge of my human nature, how does that affect my interactions with those around me?

I was kind of thinking about this the other day, and as I walked somewhere the Lord reminded me that He has urged me to treat everyone as though they are Him. That blew me away. I am to treat everyone as though they are my Savior. Obviously if Jesus were walking with me or talking to me or standing in the same room as me, I would treat Him with respect and love and would listen to Him with my entire attention (and I pray that I do these things even as He dwells in my heart). So that is how I am called to treat those around me. Wow. That means I don't get annoyed, I don't judge, I pay attention and show love and serve everyone around me.

I can't even wrap my head around that. It is such a difficult struggle to truly love others this way. It is hard and easy to get wrapped up in my own worst-sinner nature and conceit, instead of truly dying to Christ Jesus and letting Him live through me. There is an intense battle that goes on very frequently when Jesus brings this to mind. And I don't always do the right thing. But I pray that I learn to obey easily. To conceed with grace and respect and out of love for my Savior.

These are the things the Lord has laid on my heart. Very timely, as I am on a trip with 17 other people who I am called to love as if they were Jesus Himself! I almost hate to post this, because I know that I will fail. I know that I won't always live in light of this truth. But thankfully God isn't finished with me yet and I am still forever being molded and made new!